The Jeff Ware Fish Story

In the year of 1942, Jeff Ware and two sons Milton (Tutor), and Morris came to Jeff’s old home area south of Kilmichael, Mississippi looking for an old wall-typed telephone. I was much surprised that they would look for one of those old outdated relics. They were somewhat secretive at first as to why they wanted one.

The talk, at first, was all about where to find an old unit in good condition. Uncle Jeff remembered that the Ware family, the Watson family, and the Pearson family, and every family that he had known had a telephone around the turn of the century. We travelled over the community for several days looking for one of the units. They were willing to pay well for one.

I was truly puzzled. Jeff Ware nor the sons had ever expressed the slightest sentimentality for anything old. Why did they want an old obsolete telephone? For several days they wouldn’t say. They kept insisting that somebody would sell them one of those old telephones.

Finally a friend of mine made a suggestion as to why they wanted the telephone. They wanted it to use in fishing! How! Well, it was known by some that you could route wires from the telephone’s magneto output into a pond, turn the crank, and the fish would float to the top. The fish remained in a stunned condition long enough for a good swimmer to sweep them up and bring them to land.

Uncle Jeff maintained aloofness when I first asked if that was the reason he wanted an old telephone. Finally, he admitted that was the purpose of his search.

He would place magneto charged probes ahead of the one on each side of this boat. One person would operate the boat’s motor and another would crank the magneto. He would place a sweep net on each side of the boat to scoop up the minnows. After he had caught the minnows they would revive and be very good live bait.

I pointed out that the process was outrageously illegal. He said that I might be right. I asked, “Uncle Jeff, how do you hope to get by with this scheme?” His answer was quick, “Well, if we’re caught, we will throw the magneto over the side of the boat. Then we will invite the warden to come aboard and search anyway and anywhere.” I asked Uncle Jeff, “Won’t it be a lot of trouble? How will you get your magneto back? Dive for it?” Uncle Jeff answered, “No, we won’t have to dive. We have the magneto tied to a wire.” I pitched in “But he will see the wire.” Uncle Jeff came back, “Roy, we will simply tie the upper end of the wire to a nail on the boat’s side below water level.”

Uncle Jeff continued, “We will be sitting there in the boat asking, ‘What magneto?’ When the warden leaves, we will reach down in the water, catch the wire, and pull the magneto up. Then we will blow it off to dry it and go on with our fishing.”

Well, by the time the whole truth came out it was too late for me to back up on being an accomplice. They, with my help, had found and bought their old telephone with the magneto intact.

Unfortunately, for Uncle Jeff it turned out that the scheme of catching minnows would not work. It only works with fish that scavenge on the bottom. On second thought how many people in the Ruleville and Cleveland area do you suppose enjoyed shocked catfish after that telephone purchase? Uncle Jeff claimed later that he had lost the magneto.

This was written by Roy C. Watson on October 26, 1990 in Jackson, Mississippi.